Passion, Purpose, and the Promise of Change

Personal note (and maybe a word of encouragement for those struggling to find and understand their purpose right now)…

It has always amazed me over the years the renewed sense of “energy” and “life” that one discovers when one’s daily efforts begin to align with their passion. In the moment of that union, vision is conceived and purpose is birthed in the aftermath to follow. Apathy vanishes like the morning mist. Discouragement and despondency wash away like sand castles before the relentless waves of the ocean. Perspective shifts and what was once thought to be a time of “sunset” is now seen instead as one of “sunrise.” As the old chapter closes, the promise of a new chapter fully emerges, one filled with blank pages just awaiting a shift in the story. The days, weeks, months, and years of hoping and dreaming of change become the new reality and the daily experience. New beginnings. New life. Honestly, that is where I have found myself this past week. No exaggeration. This past week has been a seismic shift for me. A very long and oftentimes confusing, decades-long sojourn is finally starting to make some sense. The wilderness wanderings might finally be over…

For now, I’ll spare you all the backstory (material for future blogs) and simply reflect on this moment. As I ponder this current season of my life I am reminded of a scene in the 1981 classic movie “Chariots of Fire.” One of the main characters, Eric Liddell, speaking to his sister says, “I believe that God made me for a purpose. For China. But he also made me fast. And when I run I feel his pleasure. To give it up would be to hold Him in contempt. You’re right. It’s not just fun. To win is to honor Him.” That line has stuck with me for over 4 decades now. Purpose and pleasure become intertwined in the passion to honor God. At different times in my life, I have readily experienced that sense of joy. And it feels really good right now to have it once again coursing through my “spiritual” veins, beating fresh life into a heart that I feared was becoming stone.

So, what was the turning point? On a practical level, it was the result of refusing to give up and to just keep sending one UN Volunteer application after the other after the other after the other. Finally, amidst all the applications, one NGO in Cameroon responded and said, “if you are willing to serve, we would gladly welcome you into our family.” Yes, they said “family.” Just like that. Just that simple. The dam burst. Passion collided into the routine of my day-to-day and new purpose was born. It is hard to adequately and fully state how much time I have invested these past few nights in reading about Cameroon in general and specifically researching the current conflict in that nation. I still work my normal job during the day as always. (I have bills, financial obligations, and a mortgage that aren’t going away any time soon.) The major difference now is that I have one eye on the clock the entire day, anxiously awaiting that moment when I can quickly transition from supply chain to this new opportunity to be part of an effort to eradicate child sexual exploitation in that country. That is the practical aspect and outworking of it all.

On a spiritual level, it is all the grace and faithfulness of God. I didn’t do anything to earn it. And to that end, I’ll never fully understand it. A long, long season of waiting and continually asking, seeking, and knocking finally gave way to the dawn of a new season. In His time. At the perfect time. And to that end, like Eric Liddell, I am also persuaded that to forfeit this opportunity and privilege would be to hold Him in contempt. And so, as I have said for so many years of my life, “Lord, here am I. Use me. Send me. Give me the strength to run to win. And most of all, thank you for not giving up on me even when I had given up on the dream.”